|
If computer errors were written as haikus
Three things are certain:
Death, taxes and lost data.
Guess which has occurred.
The file you need
might be very useful.
But now it is gone
Windows NT crashed.
I am the Blue Screen of Death.
No one hears your screams.
Yesterday it worked.
Today it is not working.
Windows is like that.
Chaos reigns within.
Reflect, repent, reboot.
Order shall return.
Wind catches lily,
scattering petals to the ground.
Segmentation fault.
With searching comes loss
and the presence of absence:
File not found.
The Web site you seek
cannot be located but
endless others exist.
You step in the stream,
but the water has moved on.
This page is not here.
Stay the patient course.
Of little worth is your ire.
The network is down.
No keyboard present.
Press F1 to continue.
Zen engineering.
This site has moved.
We\'d tell you where, but then
we\'d have to delete you.
First snow, then silence.
This thousand dollar screen dies
so beautifully.
Printer not ready.
Could be a fatal error.
Have a pen handy?
Bathroom Wall Signs
Friends don\'t let friends take home ugly men.
Women\'s restroom, Starboard, Dewey Beach, DE:
Remember, it\'s not, \"How high are you?\" it\'s \"Hi, how are you?\"
Rest stop off Route 81, West Virginia:
No matter how good she looks, some other guy is sick and tired of putting up with her shit.
Men\'s room, Linda\'s Bar and Grill, Chapel Hill, N. Carolina:
A Woman\'s Rule of Thumb: If it has tires or testicles, you\'re going to have trouble with it.
Women\'s restroom, Dick\'s Last Resort, Dallas, Texas:
Express Lane: Five beers or less.
Sign over one of the urinals, Ed Debevic\'s, Beverly Hills, CA:
You\'re too good for him.
Sign over mirror Women\'s room, Ed Debevic’s, Beverly Hills, CA:
No wonder you always go home alone.
Sign over mirror in Men\'s room, Ed Debevic\'s, Beverly Hills, CA:
The best way to a man\'s heart is to saw his breast plate open.
Women\'s restroom, Murphy\'s, Champaign, IL (a few years ago):
If you voted for Clinton in the last election, you can\'t take a dump here. Your asshole is in Washington.
Men\'s room Outback Steakhouse, Tacoma, Washington:
Beauty is only a light switch away.
Perkins Library, Duke University, Durham, North Carolina:
If life is a waste of time, and time is a waste of life, then let\'s all get wasted together and have the time of our lives.
Armand\'s Pizza, Washington, D.C.:
Don\'t trust anything that bleeds for 7 days and doesn\'t die.
Men\'s restroom, Murphy\'s, Champaign, IL:
What are you looking up on the wall for? The joke is in your hands.
واحد جا له ولد و صار عمره خمس سنين و ما يتكلم ...... في يوم الولد تكلم .... و قال : خالو....ثاني يوم ..... مات خالو .... بعد اسبوع .... قال : اخوي ...... ثاني يوم ..... مات اخوه ....... و بعد اسبوع قال : بابا ..... الاب كتب وصيته على اساس انه بيموت ثاني يوم ....... مات جارهم
اثنين ساكنين في خيمة وراقدين على ظهورهم بالليل ناظر الأول للسما وقال للثاني وش تشوف ؟ قال اشوف نجوم كثيرة.... قال هذا وش يدل علية ؟ قال الثاني : ان فيه مجرات وكواكب غيرنا في هالكون . قال الأول هذا يدل ان سقف خيمتنا انسرق ياغبي
|
